New Beginnings

I bought a new journal today. There is something about a new journal that invigorates and inspires me. I think I've inherited this from my mother... she's the same way.  With a new journal there are no reminders of past failures; no reminders of how many times I've tried to do this only to quit two weeks in. With a new journal there are only clean, crisp pages... a clean, fresh start. A new journal is a new beginning.  So in my efforts to change my ways, I logged everything I ate today and kept track of calories in my new, shiny journal. I even woke up early and did my new boot camp video. Yea me! Was I perfect??? Absolutely not. Somehow a spoonful of cookie dough made it's way into my mouth, but it's better than the usual 4 spoonfuls, in addition to the 2 cookies (probably 3 cookies) that I would normally eat. So, I'm good with my one spoonful; which is a step forward for me. Usually I have that "all or nothing" mentality. Usually I would get mad at myself for eating the one spoonful. Then I'd say, "Screw it! I'll just start tomorrow," and continue to eat cookie dough and whatever else I could find. But, not today!! So, all in all, day one worked out to be pretty successful.

I'm breaking up with brownies!

So, I've had this relationship with brownies for some time now. I think it began when my husband and I started dating. We would go out together all the time, and our favorite treat was always a brownie fudge sundae. I remember eating at one restaurant, and then going to another restaurant for dessert because their brownies were better. There's just something about a brownie that soothes the soul. Perhaps its the warm, gooey, chocolatey deliciousness. (Can you tell I have issues?) Brownies have always been there for me. When I'm sad, they're always there to cheer me up. When I'm happy, they're always there to help me celebrate. When I'm stressed, they're always there to calm me down.  I will admit that it's not just brownies. That double cheeseburger would always do the trick, but there is something about a brownie that just makes everything better. After 10 years, and many, many, many pounds later, I've officially decided that my relationship with brownies needs to end. It's time to stop relying on food to cope with my emotions, and start becoming the person I want to be: A sexy, healthy, confident woman. So it is here, if front of god and everyone, that I announce the end of my relationship with brownies, and cheeseburgers, and food in general.... Now, the trick is to stop making excuses and actually get off my ass and do something to get this weight off!